Secretly - A Kratos Aurion Fanfic

Prologue: Thoughts

***
The purple sky gives way to a warm blue. You can now see the last birds fading on the horizon.
I lift my head for a moment, but blink when I feel a few raindrops falling on my face. There will be rain.
“We should find shelter. I think the chosen one doesn't feel like walking in the rain. "
The addressed looks at me. Colette. Colette Brunel. The new chosen one of world renewal. However .. she is a bit .. different.
She nods eagerly, the long blonde hair obscuring her view and she falls to the floor. That is her. The slightly different - clumsy - chosen one.
I turn around to her with no facial expressions, take a few steps to help her, when suddenly someone walks past me.
That someone gives me a warning look - “Don't touch Colette !! “- and helps her up in my place.I know that look all too well. Unfortunately .. too good.
A strange expression briefly appears on my face.
"Colette? Is everything alright with you? “, Asks the young man and just lets go of Colette's hand. The voice brings me back to reality. Immediately my features harden again and I run forward with faster steps.
“We should hurry. Unless some of us are downright keen on walking into an inn wet. “I can't help but give Lloyd a hard look.
Lloyd Irving. The cheeky, sometimes whining, sixteen-year-old boy.
Maybe he gets it wrong.
At least that's what I mean when I hear his grumbling voice quietly behind me, how he complains to Genis.
“This guy is so arrogant !! What does he actually think?
But he can't go on talking.
“Thank you, I'll be happy to return the compliment. ..Smaller."
With the last word I got my satisfaction.I really can't help it.
Maybe nobody understands it, sometimes I don't understand it myself, but I am not able to express my affection in a particularly practical way.
However, the feeling of belonging that I have gained at the moment is enough for me and I enter the inn with an inner, small smile.
***
Now I'm staring at the ceiling. It's very interesting, I have to say that.
A dark ceiling. Hmmh. Something new than if I just fix my feet.
My mood doesn't improve a bit when I hear the loud laughing voices in two rooms next door. No, my mood is only getting worse.
What is wrong with me? Not that I am surprised that sometimes I am not always just indifferent, no, it is not. It is something different.
And I finally have to get that under control.
I'm not allowed to act strangely every time Lloyd gets a little closer to me. My bowels tense up painfully just thinking about it.Lloyd’s look from earlier, the way he looked at me when I wanted to help Colette .. Well, actually that's understandable. After all, he has to protect his little friend.
Suddenly my mood lifts as if by itself.
At least that's how I can keep myself alive.
With thoughts of him. With a dream world in which we live together. With her.
...
I'm almost grateful when the loud laughter brings me back.
Path. Away from my imagination I have to ..
I listen attentively when I hear my name from the conversation of the others.
"..Kratos? "
"Yeah. We can't just leave him over there in that room. “Colette's voice.
"Why not? He seems to be getting along so well on his own. "
“Oh Lloyd, just because you have some communication problems with each other doesn't mean the rest of us. “Raine's voice. She seems a little aggressive towards Lloyd.“I can't take it off! The whole way he pretends to be just like that .. arrogant !! “He seems grumpy.
Involuntarily a smile steals on my lips.
So I'm arrogant. Well, if I'm arrogant, my dear .. then what are you?
Raine laughs out loud.
“He and arrogant? Well, he's always all right with me. He takes good care of Colette as a bodyguard. And he doesn't do anything to Genis, he behaves quite normally there. "
Genis doesn't seem to think so - misunderstood, he clears his throat.
"Yes, Genis? “Raines dear voice seems to frighten Genis all of a sudden.
"Um .. N-Of course, sis! Kratos is .. “It seems to be an effort to overcome. "..Kratos is one of the nicest people I have ever met! "
Au. That wasn't going to work out well.
My suspicions are confirmed when a hollow noise occurs - I tap Raine's head butt - and Genis utters an "Ouch"."Don't exaggerate" like that, Genis. ", Raine snaps at him. "Well, at least .." Careful not to leave the subject, she continues. “Kratos is fine. He's nice but not pushy. He is .. normal. "
Colette's voice, which immediately agrees, can be heard the loudest. Then the conversation about me seems to have ended. Anyway, there is silence for a moment.
My gaze wanders from the one dark corner to the small window where the curtains flutter gently in the evening air. A cool breeze comes in.
I close my eyes briefly and take a deep breath. The air really hasn't changed over the centuries.
It's ... so nice and quiet. I could fall asleep now. But something tells me to stay awake. I feel like this is going to be another turbulent night.
The conversation continues in a slightly louder, angry voice.
"Why do you all think about him that way !?Do you care how he treats me ?! "
Lloyd's voice.
All of a sudden I open my eyes. I listen even more spellbound.
"Lloyd, it is certainly not an abso-"
“No intention, Colette? I've always held back, but he really goes against the grain! I haven't done anything to him, so why does he keep hitting me like that !? "
Now Raine speaks. I'm trying to get rid of this disgusting feeling inside of me.
...
“Lloyd, stop it now! “, Now she's really pissed off. For whatever reason. But that's Raine. “You never thought about it before, did you? Did you even notice it once !? "
Lloyd was quiet now. If I could, I would swear Lloyd is feeling the same curiosity that I am right now.
What had Lloyd never noticed?
“Oh no, all of a sudden you can't get anything out, eh? “There is satisfaction in Rine's voice. "Lloyd, Kratos and you .. you guys are alike...Very similar."
Your voice takes on a softer tone.
Lloyd is probably more composed than I am, because he speaks again after a short silence.
"In which sense? "
His voice sounds a little strange. I can't define what's going on in him right now. Raine speaks again.
If she continued like this, she would throw me off course pretty much .. I sigh softly. My eyes are still wide open and I'm staring at the ceiling.
I can still suppress this feeling. And as long as I can, I'll be safe.
Safe? Yes, in front of myself.
"I do not know it either. “Said Raine. “But you are really alike. Kratos looks at you sometimes, and that look can really hurt you. "
Lloyd wants to say something. "But-" he starts, but Raine stops him.
“Let me finish. I don't think you get what I mean by "hurt", do you?So let me finish. Kratos is strange, you're right. He is cold-hearted towards us, doesn't speak much. But do you know what lies in those looks, Lloyd? What a feeling? "
She seems to be waiting for an answer from Lloyd. This one, however, seems very taciturn for some reason. I try to ignore the frantic pounding of my heart and keep listening.
“Unfortunately I can't tell you either. This look is indefinable. Hmm, what is Lloyd? ... Now don't say you don't know what “indefinable” means? "
There is no surprise in Rine's voice, however. She seems to have guessed it.
Genis speaks up.
“Indefinable means that something cannot be defined. Can't determine. “Lloyd still doesn't seem to understand. "Oh, Lloyd! That means that Raine doesn't know what kind of feeling that should be in Kratos ’eyes. Man, are you stupid .. "Lloyd seems slightly embarrassed when he speaks.
"Great, thank you! “, He grumbles at Genis. Then he returns to the topic.
On the subject of "My View". I should be more careful. Much more careful. Should I get colder towards him?
“I don't know what you're thinking, Raine. “, He laughs briefly.
I notice how the feeling inside of me is getting worse and deeper. To ignore. Simply ignore.
"Now don't say it's not my imagination. I do not believe that. Don't you think I didn't notice those looks? Besides, what's the point? I don't think I should be Kratos' favorite. “Lloyd is taking a short break. Then his voice sounds a little amused.
“Or do you mean to say that our Kratos fell in love with me? That he's strange is true, but something like that- "
Now it is enough. I am just about to get up in resignation and run away when I hear a resounding noise.I flinch briefly and stay still in my current position. The hands supported, the upper body straightened, the face a strange expression, and the eyes wide.
Raine's loud voice comes over to me.
"Lloyd, IT'S ENOUGH. I already know that the two of you are unlikely to become best friends, but it's ENOUGH for me !! Stop making fun of Kratos! Then don't believe me, I don't care, but you've never paid attention to it, have you? “She seems to be right about that.
By the way, I notice that my heart seems to be running a marathon right now. My bowels have now reached the climax of their painful contraction, and I really can't widen my eyes any further from the shock.
“We know almost nothing about Kratos, so we have no right to judge him like that! You don't have to cheat him just because he's a little different to you. Turn on your brain, Lloyd, and think about what else there is besides friendship and love.But you probably won't think of it anyway. So don't even start. And now you're going to move your butt towards him and nicely ask him if he doesn't want to come over here. Yes, you heard right! And if he doesn't want to come over, which I think, since he probably noticed everything anyway, because you were joking around so loudly, cracking jokes about him, - you will apologize. "
That seems to have sat. Lloyd seems upset. Colette and Genis think it better to stay