I bought a sporty cut, black shirt made of breathable microfiber (?!) ... In Yami's size. Because that should be my birthday present to him. In the store, I had it packed nicely. On the way home, I put it in Yami's mailbox with an unsigned birthday card.

At home I continued reading this book that someone recommended to me. But I really didn't find anything special about that.

After a while, bored, I put the book down and went for a walk in the park again.

It was the beginning of April, and spring was making itself felt from day to day. Soft green leaves and fresh meadow, a soft blue sky. Nature awoke to new life.

I recognized Yami at a bank. (What a coincidence ...) Why today of all times? I tried to turn quickly before he saw me, but it was too late.

He looked up, right into my eyes.

I smiled a little convulsively and wanted to run away when he got up and came towards me."Don't you want to keep me company on my birthday, Mariko?"

I guess I had no other choice because I had to pay off certain past debts. (Besides, you wanted it too ?!)

Without a word I followed Yami to his apartment.

In the apartment almost everything looked exactly the same as before. My red coat was hanging on the cloakroom and an uncomfortable feeling overcame me. (Why uncomfortable? Were nice memories, OR?)

"Here is something else that belongs to you.", Yami said and pointed to the coat. "Take her with you if you want ...

By the way, thank you for your gift. "

He smiled an ambiguous smile. So he knew it was me. How could it be otherwise ... (very insightful)

"I wasn't in the mood for cake and champagne," Yami looked at me. Because the table was empty. "But I can make us pizza."

"Why don't you celebrate your birthday a bit?" I asked out of habit. (Somehow you can't think of anything original ...)"Because there was no special reason for me," he replied self-deprecatingly. "You should know yourself."

We ate pizza, while Yami played a slightly melancholy melody.

"Why did you just leave?"

This question had to come up at some point.

"I'm sorry ... I was just too confused and had drank too much ..." I searched feverishly for explanations. "Please don't be angry with me, I didn't know what I was doing ..."

"Did you love me?" He just asked. "The moment you kissed me?"

Another difficult question ... (What's so difficult about that ?! You love him! Just admit it!)

But why is it difficult? (Exactly!) Of course I loved him ... What am I saying ... I still love him! (Detected by a hair ... Good ...)

Without waiting for my answer, he suddenly grabbed my arms and kissed me. (This is really mind blowing ~)

I got the feeling that my mind was leaving me at the speed of light.(Um ... did you even have any?)

It was like a dream. I was under hypnosis. His touch broke all my lines of defense. Any resistance was futile.

"I won't let you go this time," he said. "I'll make sure of that."

Without knowing how it could happen, I already hugged him and kissed him back.

I love him. I love his touch. I love his body and his soul. I want to feel it and never let go.

I want him. I want to break through infinity.

I felt like I was melting. I merged with him. Physical and mental.

So this is how happiness felt.

I held my happiness in my arms and I would never let go of it.

...

Yami told me that he loved me. And that I could never again let him down as easily as I did then.

"You really hurt me with that, you know?"

I promised never to leave him again. But I didn't know if I could keep my promise.Happiness made a person even more fragile and vulnerable. I needed luck, but not this sensitivity. Because I had an abundance of them.

I enjoyed life like every day was my last.