Translation
Fanfic: Voldemort und andere Nebensächlichkeiten
Chapter: Chapter 2: The Secret of the Letter
2. The secret of the letter (or: How to deal with a chapter in opening a letter ^^)
The Headmaster's Office was one of the most important rooms at Hogwarts.
There they planned, chatted and occasionally cooked.
And yet this was the only room in which the aftermath of the last war could still be clearly felt. Above all, the special aftermath in relation to the decimation of the workforce. More specifically in relation to house-elves.
In a nutshell:
There was no more filthy room in all of Hogwarts than the Headmaster's Office!
Fortunately (or to the chagrin of others), the residents didn't mind the dirt.
On the contrary; the dirtier it was around him, the cleaner Neville Longbottom, Headmaster of Hogwarts felt!
He was sitting in what was probably a green armchair, which could now name a tomato sauce red with mustard yellow dots, and stared at the contents of the 47 packets of pringels that were scattered on the floor.Suddenly there was a knock.
Neville winced and looked up.
"In!"
Slowly, with a heartbreaking squeal, the door opened and Remus entered.
"Headmaster, we have received a letter."
"A letter?" Asked Neville, puzzled. Who should write Hogwarts?
"Yes sir, a letter!" Remus repeated. He stood to attention and almost bumped his head against the inflatable snake hanging from the ceiling.
That snake had been hanging for four weeks just because Neville was too lazy to take off. And that snake was a chore for anyone over six feet tall.
Whenever you touched the snake, it would spray you with purple nail polish.
Nobody knew why she did that, only everyone was sure that Severus was their favorite victim. The only one who didn't find this funny was, surprisingly, Severus ...
"Who is the letter from?" Asked Neville with a hint of genuine interest.
"From Lord Voldemort, sir!"Remus saw Neville flinch at the sound of the name.
That was just one of the reasons Remus didn't like Neville. He thought Neville was exaggerating everything. And really; Neville was now the only person in the entire wizarding world who winced at the name.
"You-know-who ???"
"Yes, sir, from HIM!"
That was also something Remus hated; these constant repetitions! Neville was still pretending to forget everything, just as he had in school.
The fact was, Remus had personally seen Neville recite "Romeo and Juliet" completely from memory.
"What is HE writing?"
"I haven't opened the letter yet, sir."
"I don't care! What did HE write?"
Was Neville that hollow, or was he just pretending to be, as usual? Remus wondered before answering:
"Sir, I don't know! Since I haven't opened the letter yet, I've had a hard time looking inside!""Oh," was Neville's reaction, "then call a teachers conference right away!"
"Yes sir!" Remus said and left. He was glad to finally be out of the pigsty.
Little by little, all the teachers gathered in the headmaster's office.
First James and Remus came in and dropped onto a couch. At least after she had used Tempo, pretzel sticks and four smelly, empty milk bottles from the couch to the floor.
Then Severus came. He walked hunched over, taking great care not to get too close to the snake.
Finally Sirius came into the office as well.
That said, 'came' may be the wrong word ...
Much more he rushed into the room, looked around briefly and discovered:
"SEVERUUUUS!"
With a primal scream and a wagging tail, Sirius stormed towards Severus. He was so frightened and wanted to jump out of the way of the monster that was coming at him with flapping ears and panting tongue.
But unfortunately he had overlooked a certain snake ...* sprotzzzzz *
And already Severus was lying on the floor and was covered all over with purple nail polish. And as if that weren't enough, he felt a tongue licking across his face.
Severus suddenly wanted to die badly. As quickly as possible.
A little later, after Severus ran out of the office screaming and Sirius lay half dead on the floor again, Remus finally opened the letter.
Neville didn't notice that much anymore; he had made the mistake of standing between Sirius and Severus. In other words, Neville was stuck to the ceiling, passed out next to the now knotted snake.
"So what is he writing?" Asked James, bored.
"Wait ..." Remus said slowly, "He's got quite a bit of a pig."
"So there aren't any pictures of naked women in there?" James raked. These were the Playboy withdrawal symptoms; James hadn't had one in his hand in three full hours.
"Ah, now I have it," Remus said quietly, "Voldemort is challenging us to a Quidditch match!"
The Headmaster's Office was one of the most important rooms at Hogwarts.
There they planned, chatted and occasionally cooked.
And yet this was the only room in which the aftermath of the last war could still be clearly felt. Above all, the special aftermath in relation to the decimation of the workforce. More specifically in relation to house-elves.
In a nutshell:
There was no more filthy room in all of Hogwarts than the Headmaster's Office!
Fortunately (or to the chagrin of others), the residents didn't mind the dirt.
On the contrary; the dirtier it was around him, the cleaner Neville Longbottom, Headmaster of Hogwarts felt!
He was sitting in what was probably a green armchair, which could now name a tomato sauce red with mustard yellow dots, and stared at the contents of the 47 packets of pringels that were scattered on the floor.Suddenly there was a knock.
Neville winced and looked up.
"In!"
Slowly, with a heartbreaking squeal, the door opened and Remus entered.
"Headmaster, we have received a letter."
"A letter?" Asked Neville, puzzled. Who should write Hogwarts?
"Yes sir, a letter!" Remus repeated. He stood to attention and almost bumped his head against the inflatable snake hanging from the ceiling.
That snake had been hanging for four weeks just because Neville was too lazy to take off. And that snake was a chore for anyone over six feet tall.
Whenever you touched the snake, it would spray you with purple nail polish.
Nobody knew why she did that, only everyone was sure that Severus was their favorite victim. The only one who didn't find this funny was, surprisingly, Severus ...
"Who is the letter from?" Asked Neville with a hint of genuine interest.
"From Lord Voldemort, sir!"Remus saw Neville flinch at the sound of the name.
That was just one of the reasons Remus didn't like Neville. He thought Neville was exaggerating everything. And really; Neville was now the only person in the entire wizarding world who winced at the name.
"You-know-who ???"
"Yes, sir, from HIM!"
That was also something Remus hated; these constant repetitions! Neville was still pretending to forget everything, just as he had in school.
The fact was, Remus had personally seen Neville recite "Romeo and Juliet" completely from memory.
"What is HE writing?"
"I haven't opened the letter yet, sir."
"I don't care! What did HE write?"
Was Neville that hollow, or was he just pretending to be, as usual? Remus wondered before answering:
"Sir, I don't know! Since I haven't opened the letter yet, I've had a hard time looking inside!""Oh," was Neville's reaction, "then call a teachers conference right away!"
"Yes sir!" Remus said and left. He was glad to finally be out of the pigsty.
Little by little, all the teachers gathered in the headmaster's office.
First James and Remus came in and dropped onto a couch. At least after she had used Tempo, pretzel sticks and four smelly, empty milk bottles from the couch to the floor.
Then Severus came. He walked hunched over, taking great care not to get too close to the snake.
Finally Sirius came into the office as well.
That said, 'came' may be the wrong word ...
Much more he rushed into the room, looked around briefly and discovered:
"SEVERUUUUS!"
With a primal scream and a wagging tail, Sirius stormed towards Severus. He was so frightened and wanted to jump out of the way of the monster that was coming at him with flapping ears and panting tongue.
But unfortunately he had overlooked a certain snake ...* sprotzzzzz *
And already Severus was lying on the floor and was covered all over with purple nail polish. And as if that weren't enough, he felt a tongue licking across his face.
Severus suddenly wanted to die badly. As quickly as possible.
A little later, after Severus ran out of the office screaming and Sirius lay half dead on the floor again, Remus finally opened the letter.
Neville didn't notice that much anymore; he had made the mistake of standing between Sirius and Severus. In other words, Neville was stuck to the ceiling, passed out next to the now knotted snake.
"So what is he writing?" Asked James, bored.
"Wait ..." Remus said slowly, "He's got quite a bit of a pig."
"So there aren't any pictures of naked women in there?" James raked. These were the Playboy withdrawal symptoms; James hadn't had one in his hand in three full hours.
"Ah, now I have it," Remus said quietly, "Voldemort is challenging us to a Quidditch match!"