Translation
Fanfic: Lieben heißt loslassen (3)
Chapter: Goodbye
Hi guys!
to read the second part, you have to look a little further back..don't know why..aba is like that.
(if you even want to read it)
okay ... then I'll start!
"...talk..."
' think '
words written apart are emphasized
I was standing in front of her room for a quarter of an hour. Misa was gracious enough to tell me where Akiko's room was. I looked at Gina for a moment. She smiled and nodded.
I raised my hand and pressed the little button. It rang.
I heard footsteps and then she opened the door for me. Akiko.
"Ranma ... what do you want here?"
"Can we talk?"
She sighed.
"Okay. Come in."
I walked into the room and it wasn't the least bit different from Gina's.
"Do you want something to drink?"
"No thanks."
I sat on the bed and she stood across from me, leaning against the dresser.
"I miss you so much, Akiko ..." I finally said. "Please come back."
"No." She answered."It wasn't an affair. It was just one night ..."
"Ranma ... it will never be just one night. If you can do it once, then you can do it again and again. Over and over and again and again. And the next time it will be easier for you. I already have that Been through it all. I've seen it all at my father's. "
"God, Akiko! I'm not like your father!"
She laughed in agony.
"I should have known ... I should have known ... the romantics are the worst men ... they give you flowers and chocolates. The men who promise one woman never to love another. They are the worst ... And one day they get bored ... they need a change. This short romance. Aren't you, Ranma? "
I hated the way she talked about me.
It was true. I was one of many men in this world. But I didn't want to be one of them. I wanted to be special to Akiko ...
"I'm sorry Akiko.I'm sorry for hurting you ... I ... I will always be sorry, you know ... You are the last person in this world I want to hurt. "
"It can't go on like this ... what will you do when I move back in? Are you satisfied then? It won't be the same as it used to be ..."
"I know, I know ..." I said. But in my head a voice said, "Why not? Why not?"
"We were together for years. We made love. But now you've thrown everything ... everything away."
“I can understand you,” I said. And a big part of me, she really understood. But the other ... the other was still in doubt.
Akiko was right. I wanted us to be together again as we were at the beginning of our relationship. I wanted us to live like this forever. Because we were so happy back then.
"Do you think it's easy for me to live in our house? I felt so cramped ... that's why I stayed in the hospital longer. I don't want to be one of those women who sit around at home, waiting for their husband and then cook the food! ""Hmm ... then I'm very surprised that you didn't leave me before."
Akiko started pacing up and down. She frowned and sighed again.
"You haven't given me a reason. Until now. I'm only 24, Ranma. But sometimes I feel so old."
"Just come back home, Akiko ... you and me. I want it to be the same as it used to be."
"It will never be the same again. You changed everything. I trusted you!" Her voice sounded hoarse and she shook her head. "I was so stupid. I trusted you and you betrayed my trust, Ranma! I felt ... so stupid for doing this ... I wonder why?"
"But you don't get divorced for just one bloody night! It's not exactly what adults do. And we are adults. I know it hurts. I know I made a mistake. But why. I know it hurts." have I turned from Mr. Wonderful to Mr. Piece of Shit in your eyes? "
Akiko had to smile weakly.“You're not Mr. Piece of Shit, Ranma.” She shook her head. Her eyes filled with tears, but she tried to hold them back. She wanted to stop them. She didn't want to cry in front of my eyes. "You're just ... another man. I can see it. I gave you so much ... I made you feel like you were special. I gave up so much for you ... my old home ... my home."
“I appreciate that, Akiko. I know how difficult it was for you to leave your relatives and your hometown. But that's exactly why I want this marriage to work again. That's why I want us try again. "
“I've been thinking a lot in the last few hours, Ranma,” Akiko said. "If we try again and you cheat on me again, the pain will be worse. And I don't want to go through what I'm going through right now!"
I didn't know what to say to that.
"Listen, Akiko.I will do everything to make you come back. What do you want?"
“I want my life back,” she replied. "That's all. I want to live again. I don't want to be hurt anymore. I don't want to cry anymore."
"I promise you ... I'll never hurt you again."
Our eyes met briefly.
"Yes, Ranma. You will. And this marriage will no longer work. Believe me, it's over."
"You mean you want to divorce me?" I asked carefully and I felt my voice trembling.
"Yes, I want a divorce."
"You can't have thought about that in less than two hours! Don't you want to sleep in that?"
"Ranma ... I've thought a lot in these two hours. And this decision is just as difficult for me as it is for you. But it just doesn't work anymore."
"Don't you love me then?"
Akiko sat down next to me on the bed and felt for my hands. She gave it a light squeeze.
"Yes. I love you. But something has been lost.I'm not in love with you anymore We are finally over. Please accept this."
"Can't we still be friends?"
"I don't know. We'll see."
So it was over. I couldn't do anything anymore. I lost her.
I got up and went to the door.
"Send me the papers so I can sign," I said.
"Ranma, before you go ..."
"Hm?"
"I ... I don't hate you for what you did. I'm just very disappointed in you."
"Goodbye, Akiko."
"Bye."
I closed the door of her room and leaned against it for a moment. Why? Just why?
I clenched my fists and walked to the elevator, shaking my head.
"Ranma? Hey, Ranma!"
Gina ran after me and grabbed my shoulders.
"... W ... what?"
I guess I was so lost in my thoughts that I hadn't heard or seen her.
"Gina ... I'm sorry ..."
She smiled understandingly.
"No problem. Didn't go well, did it?"
"No ... she wants to divorce me.""Shit ... shit ..." she muttered. She grabbed her head and shook it like I did. "Shit ..." she said again.
"What is it? What are you saying, Gina?"
"It's my fault ... Oh, Ranma ... you don't even know ... Shit! I'm so sorry ... sorry ... I ... we should never have met ..."
"No ... it was my fault ... I shouldn't have ... oh ... it doesn't matter now ... don't worry ..."
She hesitated for a moment, but the look on my face finally made her give in and nod slightly.
"Um ... Ranma ... there is something I should tell you ..."
"It can't be worse than what I've experienced, can it?"
"Come over..."
Gina grabbed my hand and led me outside.
"What you up to?"
"Let us go for a walk."
We walked through a nearby park and sat on a bench.
"I ... I'll fly back to England tomorrow," she said finally.
I looked at her sideways.But she did not return my gaze, but looked straight ahead.
"You want to get out of my life now too?" I asked softly.
"I didn't plan to do that ... but my girlfriend ... she wants to move back to Japan and continue taking photos here ... I want to help her move."
"That means we'll see each other again someday?"
"Yes ... maybe in two months. I don't know."
"You have my cell phone number ..."
"I will write to you or call you."
"How do you get to the airport?"
"I ordered a taxi."
"I hope to see each other again ... really ..."
She put her hand on mine.
"Me too..."
I don't know how long we sat there and said nothing. But I know it was very comforting for me to sit next to her.
The next day I wanted to say goodbye to her. When I arrived, she was about to get into her taxi.
"Gina!" I called.
She saw me and smiled.
"Ranma ... you shouldn't have come ...""I wanted to ... say goodbye to you ..."
We looked at each other briefly and then we hugged for a long time.
"We'll meet again ... for sure ..." she whispered.
"Be careful ... I'll wait for you and your girlfriend ..."
She broke away from my embrace and got into the taxi.
I looked after her and one question persisted. What was her friend's name actually? In our conversations, she never mentioned her name ... why?
And although I didn't know her for long, I had the feeling that we had met somewhere before. Maybe in a previous life?
A little depressed, I drove home and went about my work. I ran a combat school and at the time had many students whom I taught.
I once took part in a championship myself ... but that was a long time ago.
Spring turned into summer and nothing special happened.
Not even Gina answered. The only one who answered was Akiko.
We conducted a short trial and we were divorced by the end of July.I lay awake late on those evenings, staring at the ceiling.
Next to me it was empty. I felt lonely and alone. And in mid-August, four and a half months after Gina's departure, it was so unbearably hot in the evening that I ran through the house looking for an old photo album. I wanted to distract myself somehow. There wasn't even a cool breeze.
It was a quarter to eleven when the phone rang.
“Ranma Saotome.” I reported.
“Ranma?” It was my father.
"Father, what's the matter?"
Yes, my father and I once fell into a spring in China, and for a long time I was cursed. Every time we came into contact with cold water, I turned into a girl and he turned into a panda.
We talked about the old days and he mentioned a name that I had forgotten since I moved out. Tendo.
"Tendo?" I asked.
"You know ... Soun, my old friend ... and his three daughters ... By the way, Kasumi is married to Dr. Tofu and Nabiki is studying in America!And do you know what Akane is doing? She is abroad too! Unfortunately, Soun hasn't heard much from her ... I've only just spoken to him ... "
Akane ... my former fiancée ... I remembered