For a long time we just look at the starry sky without saying a word. But after a while I break the silence: "Why don't you eat deer and hare meat?And why did you panic so much about the fur? "

Nini looks at me and seems to be looking for the right words.



"Well, I've got used to pork, beef and chicken. But I can't eat rabbit and deer meat. The images of the dead animals keep popping up in front of me. Their agony, the panic in their eyes. And then, when." they are dead, those expressionless eyes. The once proudly raised head lies powerless on the ground. "

On the one hand I can understand them, but on the other hand I can't either!

"But sometimes the agony can only last a short time! Besides, these animals are much more lucky! They can live in freedom! They have never been locked in tight cages. But for this happiness they sometimes have to pay with their lives, that is the run of nature. ", I say and swing myself onto the railing. I stay there, with my back to the sky, and look at Nini. She thinks again.

"Yes, maybe. But I still can't eat these animals.Maybe they were happy. But they didn't stand a chance against us humans. We took away their place of life and now they have to adapt to nature. We humans are the strongest and happiest beings. The animals don't stand a chance against us. Somehow we take advantage of that. I don't want to take advantage of anyone. And certainly not the animals. That's against everything I believe in. I can not do this. Everything in me resists something like that. ", says Nini. Yes, I can understand you. But I don't agree with you.



Again we fall into silence. But it's not an awkward silence.

"What happened in your past that you always slept so badly? Why did Jenny's disappearance bother you so much?", Nini asks me. I look at them and think about it. Should i tell her? Does she really want to know?

"You don't even want to know! It's too bad!" I reply.

Silence again.

"Yes, I want to know!Otherwise I would not have asked! What is different about your past than about Talas? Why are you so much more bitter? ", she asks.



So she wants to know. Okay, then I'll tell her: "I was born in the abbey. My grandfather had big plans for me. So I learned to blade from an early age. I guess Tala explained to you what is bladen, or? "When Nini nods, I continue:" But the upbringing was cruel. I wasn't allowed to show any feelings, otherwise I was beaten. There was no joy or sadness. Only anger! My parents saw how much I changed negative. They didn't want to play any more and freed me. Then they fled with me. Throughout Russia. I can still remember the evening. The first snow had fallen. It was already dark. I was standing on a street with my parents. Only a lantern on the other side of the street gave a little light, and then suddenly masked men came all in black.They stabbed my parents with knives. And I just stood there helplessly and couldn't move. I was only three years old. "



Tears well up in my eyes, but I hold them back. Only after I've calmed down a bit do I continue: "My parents died. They fell in front of me in the snow and it turned red. Their eyes were wide and it seemed to me as if they were looking at me reproachfully. The men took I went back to the abbey with me. At first I cried. They almost beat me to death so that I wouldn't show any feelings, but that was fine with me. I just wanted to die. And then at some point there were no more tears. Inside me there was only still pain. "Again I take a break. It's just too hard to tell about it without crying.



"So they left me alone. And yet I wanted to die. I felt so helpless and thought I was to blame for the death of my parents. I am indirectly too.I've made several suicide attempts. And that at the age of 3! The only thing that kept me alive, however, was my Bitbiest Dranzer. It gave me warmth and eased the pain a bit. That's how I survived.

When Jenny suddenly disappeared, this helplessness came over me again. I just couldn't take it! "



Silence again. I'm waiting to see how Nini will react. She is upset, but says nothing. That's fine with me too. I don't need pity After some time in which I had composed myself, I asked her: "What about your past? Why were you so dismissive when you came into this world?"



Nini just looks at me for a long time. She still propped her arms on the balustrade.

"I looked for the wrong friends! They gave me a feeling of security, I felt a part of it. So I did not notice how I was more and more under their spell. They made me steal. But there was no light because I felt confirmed.I was lucky and never got caught. And so I kept my eyes closed to reality. I only saw what I wanted. And then I fell in love with a boy of theirs. I was so happy that he loved me too. Like in 7th heaven. But happiness did not last long. He took advantage of me and played with me. At first I didn't notice it, but then I became more and more aware of it. Reality caught up with me. So I withdrew, didn't talk to anyone anymore. I spent my time at the PC. After a while, I got to know a few people there. They built me ​​up more and more. The pain stayed in my heart and will always be there. And then I came into this world. "



So she doesn't have a nice past either. Now I understand why she was so bitchy. But she seems to trust me just as I trust her. I jump off the balcony parapet again and stand next to Nini. So we both look at the moon again in silence.Suddenly a shooting star appears in the sky.

"Make a wish!" Says Nini and briefly closes her eyes. So I close my eyes and make a wish (what will only be revealed later ^^).



When I open my eyes again, Nini is standing in front of me. "Let's hope it works!", She says and smiles slightly. I feel how warmth spreads inside me. I can't take my gaze away from her eyes. Those blue eyes, with all the yellow and brown spots in them. Those absolutely unique eyes! Slowly, very slowly, our faces are getting closer. I can feel her breath on my lips. Something is holding me back while something else in me pushes me further. I slowly close my eyes.



"I would like to ask you to go to bed! Your body temperature is increased. This could be a sign of a fever!"

We move apart and stare at the light on the balcony.Without saying anything, I walk past him and go to bed. I can not believe it. Don't believe what I almost did. Why? Is it just the desire not to be alone, or is it more? Is it love No! That can not be! I'm probably just overexerting! Maybe that was just too much information for me today! My head can't process it properly and is nuts. Although I am not tired yet, I fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.



(Jenny's point of view)

The food was excellent! It was really wonderful to finally be able to eat something sensible again! Now I'm sitting in our room with Tala and we're staring at each other. What should we talk about? I can't think of anything. So I keep silent. But the silence is not uncomfortable! It's like everyone chasing after their own thoughts.



"Have you lied before?" I ask Tala after a while and tear him out of his thoughts.He looks at me in surprise.

"Yes, I did! If I was told to! But never my friends, if you want to allude to Nini and Kai! And you?"

"White lies! FOR my friends! I can lie well, but I don't use it because I just don't find it right! Besides, it comes out after a while! Or you get entangled in a whole web of lies!", I answer after long thinking. Tala nods in agreement.



Actually, I don't really know Tala at all! We only exchanged a few words at a time. Yes, I haven't spoken great to anyone! What is this world doing to me? Why am i so still

Suddenly a light appears in our room: “You mustn't fight!” His voice sounds high and slightly shrill. Like a woman's. Are there also two genders with the lights?

"Why should we fight? Who?" Asks Tala, a little surprised.

"The other side is not that bad! You are just like us!Exercisotete! - I summon you!

Nemo iudex in sua causo! - Nobody is a judge in his own trial! But both sides take it out! You want to judge the others! "Her voice sounds totally rushed. As if she was about to leave us again! I'm just opening my mouth to ask something when two other lights appear.

“Sorry for bothering you!” With these words, they disappear with the feminine light.



Tala and I just look at each other, confused. What was going on now? Another light appears. This is slowly starting to get on my nerves! You just can't tell these lights apart!

"Sorry that she bothered you! Don't listen to her words! Unfortunately, I have to admit that there are people here who are a bit ... 'confused'! But don't worry, you won't be bothered anymore!" the light.

"It's okay!" Says Tala. What's okay with that? I get up and mean in a firm voice: "I want to speak to you!"



Somehow I feel strong I know what I want and want to enforce it! I'm finally myself again! I often break the rules. Not like Tala. He seems to follow every rule, execute every command immediately. Maybe it's his past. But I'm not going to be shut up so quickly! I want to know what this light wanted! Want to get to know his motivations!

I don't know why, but somehow I liked this feminine light! I want to get to know it better! Maybe I can learn more about this world from him!

"You want what?", Tala and the light ask at the same time.

But I am silent and look at her steadily. My decision is made! I want to speak this light!

"That doesn't work! You are putting your life on the line!" Says the light.

"Wrong, you risked