hurt her? Did I make her doubt too? What did I do wrong? These questions run through my mind as I walk down the long corridor. But why am I so worried about Jenny? I don't really know her at all. I never talked to her much. Only when we got lost in the snowstorm did I get to know her a little. Jenny is so very different from Nini. She is the exact opposite of Nini. You can't compare the two at all.Nini is more the loud, a little hysterical, a bit bitchy girl, and Jenny the quiet, calm, withdrawn girl. Although Jenny is very stubborn. Jenny knows what she wants, and she has wonderful ideals too. But when I compare Nini and Jenny I somehow feel something else deep down inside. Nini is important to me. She is like my sister, mother or best friend. But with Jenny it's different. Somehow, when I look into her really unique eyes, I feel the iceberg around my heart getting a little less. Suddenly it flashes through me like lightning. Only now. Only now, after thinking so hard about it, do I realize that I love Jenny. And I've never told her before. I have always only spoken of Kai and, above all, of Nini. But I never told Jenny that she was also very important to me. But can it really be? Do I really have feelings for Jenny? Do I really feel something for Jenny?Or do I just hide behind the pretext of liking Jenny so that the pain becomes less? Am I just imagining it? I don't want to hurt anyone. And certainly not Jenny. No way! STOP! STOP! Have I changed so much? I don't want to hurt Jenny? Usually I wouldn't care if I hurt someone. No matter if physically or mentally. But I care about Jenny. How should I know how to interpret my feelings? Nobody taught me. I only know hatred, anger and anger. I can interpret and control these feelings. But I don't know feelings like love, affection and happiness. I only got to know happiness and joy in this world. When I saw Kai again after the snow storm. Yes, I was happy for the first time. Really happy and happy. But love? I don't know anything like that. I don't know if I feel love for Jenny. I don't even know what love really is. Somehow I feel stupid, naive and young.I've been through so much and don't even know what love really is.



Suddenly I stop and run back to our room. I need to know how I feel about Jenny. My legs run as if by themselves. I don't really know the way because I haven't paid attention to where I'm going, but now I'm kind of being driven. I don't know from what, from whom. I tear open the door and rush into the interior of the room. My breath stops, my blood freezes, my eyes widen and protrude, and I freeze in my movement.



Jenny is not in the room !!!!! Only after a few seconds can I free myself from my rigidity and go further into the room. My heart is beating up to my neck and the cold sweat has formed on my forehead. Where's jenny Did you take the lights back with you? Because she talked to the "feminine" light? If you did something to her, then .....


"Jenny !!!!!" I scream and storm out of the room again. I have to find her. I don't want to think about it when something has happened to her! And so I run in the other direction. Jenny will hardly have walked down the hallway I was in. Otherwise I would have seen her. And so I walk through a door and on and on. My legs run by themselves and I can feel them getting heavier and heavier. But I keep walking. I feel tired and weak, but I don't give in. I have to find Jenny. Where is she? Where can she be?



"JENNY !!!!!" I yell again and then walk through a large door made of dark wood with a silver doorknob. The song of birds penetrates my ear, the scent of fresh flowers fills my nose and a gentle summer breeze blows into my face. I search the area with my eyes. I am in the middle of a summer meadow. How can this be possible? How is it And suddenly my eyes get stuck on one point.I see black hair and a red top. Immediately my legs start moving again.



"Jenny! Jenny !!!!!" I call. She turns to me and stands up. I don't stop, I hug her. A boulder falls from my heart. Jenny is fine. Nothing is wrong with her. I hold her tight to me. My heart is still beating so hard that I fear it will jump out of my chest. But at the moment I don't care. I am so happy that Jenny is fine.



Suddenly my muscles tense. I feel Jenny wrap her arms around me and lean her head against my neck. I feel her breath on my neck and instantly goose bumps cover my body. Blood rushes to my head. I quickly bury my head with her and inhale her scent. I never want to let go of her. Never again. And so we stand there. In the middle of the flower meadow. All around us the birds sing and the wind rustles in the leaves.The block of ice around my heart has finally melted.



(Jenny's point of view)

I'm still staring at the ceiling. Oh, there's no point lying here and moping up! I have to think of something else! Tala with his constant: Kai and Nini here, Kai and Nini there, can still be stolen from me! I try to suppress the sadness, the pain and the jealousy, but it doesn't work. I have to get out of here! Got to do something.



I carefully open the door and peer out. No, Tala is not there. Which way did he go? I hope I don't meet him! Where do they hide the feminine light? I want more answers to my questions !! I have to find it! So I stomp off. Let's see if my path leads me to the light. From my side to something else, the main thing is that I get answers.



And so I run. It seems like an eternity to me. At one point I am about to turn back. But my ambition drives me forward.Besides, I don't feel like having to keep quiet with Tala again!

The worst way to miss someone,

is to sit by his side and know

that it will never be yours!



I like that saying. But he painfully shows me how far away Tala is! So close yet so far. Why did I have to fall in love with him of all people? Oh, love is pretty unfathomable!



There is a big door in front of me. Where is it going? Just try it out! I open it carefully. Immediately warm air hits me. I step through the door and blindly close my eyes. Slowly, blinking quite often, I open it again.



A meadow of flowers stretches out in front of me! The sun is warm and friendly above me. Am I outside the building? I look back, but there I can only see the door and a high concrete wall. Then nothing. But there were so many windows in the corridor!Somehow everything here seems totally enchanted to me!



A butterfly flutters past my eyes and directs my gaze back to the flower meadow. I like the winter better, but a flower meadow like this is beautiful too! I run a little and then just sit down on the meadow. The spicy scent rises in my nose and I have to sneeze. There are many wild flowers around me. Should I try to make a flower wreath? No, I don't feel like doing that at the moment. This weather absolutely does not suit my mood!



In my mind I pluck out one flower after the other and tear them apart. Just because. I might as well be standing on a totally overcrowded street, I wouldn't care either!



"Jenny! Jenny!" Who is calling for me? Sounds a lot like Tala! He sounds so happy. I turn around and see him running towards me. I get up immediately. He'll probably tell me right now that he's found Nini and Kai again.He can't look forward to anything else! For a moment I hope that he's so happy because he found me, but I immediately choke it off.



But instead of stopping in front of me, Tala hugs me! At first I am totally perplexed. What is he so happy about that he hugs me? But he doesn't say anything. Not a single word. I feel so safe. I automatically wrap my arms around him. I'm totally happy for no reason. For no reason? Isn't it a reason to be happy that Tala hugs me? And yet there is fear in me that I was wrong! That he doesn't hug me because he's happy to have finally found me, but because he wants to tell me something great. But he remains silent. I'm slowly relaxing, starting to enjoy this hug. To enjoy being around. His warmth.



And so we just stand there. In the middle of this meadow. The sun shines warmly on us. At that moment everything seems so perfect.