Yale, that was my name, and I was supposed to be a boy too, whatever that was. But what did I care? It was way too warm and dark here for me to worry about it. Only the round things on my face were annoying now and then. They kept changing. Lately there were hairy little things when you stroke them. What was all this crap supposed to be for? So far I hadn't found any use for it. And there was more that was floating around so uselessly. A long tube-like structure, for example. It was soft and easy to play around with. Turn it back and forth and ... wait a minute, turn it back and forth? There was something else. Those weird long things you did that with. One hand and there was another. I had already found out what they were good for. You could pinch your little fingers on it and then make dents in the soft stuff that was everywhere. But what was that?Now there was a bump from above. Nothing had to change here. That was my warm, humid realm. That had to be corrected immediately. One small push with the fist and it was gone again. No moment that wasn't a hand at all. Was there more? A foot? Yes, a foot with little toes on it. So you could move that too? Great, why am I only finding out now? That had to be tested immediately. Let's see what made bigger dents, hand or foot.
"A very agile little guy!" Came it from somewhere. I didn't know the voice yet. What was she doing here? Rough and scratchy, hopefully it will disappear soon. Where was the one who always came to visit?
"Yes, it depends entirely on his father!" Scolded a soft voice. But she wasn't. That was the being that was always there. I heard them often. Sometimes it was very loud and then the regular bum bum hit so quickly that I got a headache here. But when we were alone and there were no strange voices, then she was very calm and gentle.Often times she would sing a song before we fell asleep. It was about a moon and a man in it, whatever it was. What a shame she didn't sing now. It was just so cozy here and a little nap after all the bumps I had left here was really nice. But now it started again. The steady bum bum, which soothed so nicely, was always quick. Though that might as well be. Then it was sure to come, that dark voice. The bum bum got faster and faster when it came.
"You are late!"
"I'm sorry, I overslept!" That there, that was her. I liked the voice. She always does funny things. Once we competed with dents. One always came from above and I pushed it back. Only the voice that was always there didn't like it. At some point she got up and then there was no more dent. It's a shame, actually, but you could first make yourself noticed. Once the newly discovered foot, mhh ... where was it again?Oh yes, there, no that was a hand. Shit, but you surely noticed it anyway. Was drawn out with a swing.
"And what is it?" Asked the voice that was supposed to be playing with me. Hey here I was and I was a boy. I had only just found out, but rather late than never.
"A boy!" Came the reply. Yes, I thought to myself, but where was the difference? Was there even one? In any case, the dark voice seemed pleased.
"A boy? That should be celebrated!", She said and, as always, when she sounded so soft, it became nice and warm here. Really cozy. That was certainly due to the fact that everything rocked so nicely. The warm stuff that flowed through me also made me extremely happy. So I couldn't have felt better if it hadn't been for that fateful day.
I admit it was a bit tight here, but that wasn't a reason to leave, was it?I would never bump the soft stuff here again, if only I could stay here. But see for yourself what can happen to you in a single day:

Actually, everything started so nicely. I turned back and forth and turned twice and found a really great, comfortable position. It was quiet too. No loud shouting or complaining like in the last few days. Not even the being that was always here said anything. Actually, you could have gone back to sleep straight away. But what was that supposed to mean all at once. It was already tight enough here, what was it that squeezed the stuff even closer together? I didn't like that at all. Go away, I thought, and kept nudging it aside. After a while it stopped. Phew ... just went well again. I shouldn't try that again. I could get angry, yes! After everything was quiet again, I thought nothing of it and made myself comfortable again. But something ran away from here.Where was the water that I always swam in? I didn't like that at all. Something was going on here, that inevitably became clear to me when the being that was always here also woke up.
"Enrico wake up, my water has burst!", She said hectically. Your what was burst? Nothing to burst here. Not as long as I've been here.
But that's exactly what it was. I shouldn't stay here anymore. Again, the soft stuff around me meant that I had to snuggle up to it. I didn't mean to cuddle. Especially not with something like that. Go away, I scolded him, but he didn't listen to me.
"What, who?", The dark voice rang out sleepily, whether it was probably her fault. The soft voice always said that when there was something she didn't like.
"Go and get Anette, I need a midwife!", Yes, go and get help, something bad is happening here. I inevitably had to agree. That couldn't be. What did I do wrong? Did I have to kick too often?Had a bump just got too big? I didn't mean to get crushed here.
"But I wanted to bring him into the world!" Where did he want to take me? What kind of world? This was my world and this is where I would stay! He probably didn't have them all anymore!
"Get out of here! I have no time here for your games", just give it to him, we needed professional help here. A soft shuffle and a loud bang and the dark voice was gone. Hopefully he would hurry. It was so tight here that it couldn't stay that way. Hey you being, you who are always here, do something. And she did something too. She screamed and I slipped a bit. It was even tighter here. That was clearly not a good thing. The wrong direction strange creature, try the other way around. I grumbled, but she didn't hear me. Instead there were tons of excited voices. I had heard most of them before, but they were of no help. They just bustled around until finally a word of power was uttered: "Get out of here!All! Just not you, you stay here so I can hate you for this! "Who should stay here? Hopefully someone who knew what he was doing. Well, if you want someone who didn't know, the main thing is not the dark voice.
"Because of me you can break my hand like last time! The main thing is that I don't miss this!", I had suspected it. Of course he, who else. But what did he mean last time? Has this happened before? How terrible. Which poor being had to go through this too, please? Oh crap now I slipped a bit again. There was no more space here, didn't the voices notice? It didn't go any further here.
So that's how it should all end. Crushed because a few ignorant voices didn't do anything about it. I would never play with that long hose again. Never leave dents with your fist again. It was all over. Again there was a loud scream followed by a few curses. Yes, only you have problems, I thought to myself.What did that thing think how I was doing here. Narrowed and my water was gone and again it went down a bit. Where should that end? I was already hurting. Couldn't this have been made bigger? But no, I pushed my way through here too. Of course I have fun with it. When I got back I would make bumps, you would hear and see pass. You can rely on that. But what was that? Something was cold on the head here. Hey here's a draft. What was that supposed to mean? Don't think I'll go somewhere it's so ... too late. One last scream, the strange voice and suddenly everything was cold. And bright and loud! Where was the water? What kind of stuff was that here? Suddenly nothing was constricting anymore. There wasn't even anything here. Where did I end up here? That couldn't be. Brings me back: "Wähhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!" Was that me? Anyway, that was too much here. There was also something that held me tight and a dark outline. Help!I didn't want to be here. Hey don't wrap anything around me! No wake up, the scratch. "Wähhhhhhhhhhhhh!", That's exactly what you should hear. Now I'm going to tell you all about it. "Wäähhhhhh!" Again, so that you know exactly that I don't like it here at all. Even my boom boom wasn't there. I could have howled. What did I do then?
"Welcome to the world, I'm your papa!" Said the strange shape. Yes you, I don't care. Please bring me back.
"And that there, is your mom?", Huh what is who? Everything was light here. Are you sure you know what you're talking about? You weird papa you.
"Give it to me!", Mumbled the exhausted voice, which I had only heard screaming last time. It sounded very weak, I'd never heard it like this before. Hopefully it didn't go away like my boom boom.
Uh again it was suddenly very drafty here. I rushed through something that was definitely not water and then all of a sudden it was back.My boom boom, that was still there. It wasn't gone and it was soft here too. Your luck, otherwise I would have made terror ... yawn.
What a day. If only I had slept through it.
"Hello Yale!" Came the soft voice and was just as tired as I was.
Hello, I thought to myself and good night. With that I closed the hairy round things on my face and everything was nice and dark again. My bum bum was there again, that had to be enough for now. When I was awake again, I would show you that I don't find this fun at all ..