Plunder Island, but now we finally have a new captain and so we decided to go back to sea and experience adventures," Haggis replied exuberantly.
It couldn't all be true! Joe pinched his own arm to make sure he wasn't dreaming.He was starting to feel like he was on one of those "Hidden Camera" programs ... And that feeling got worse when suddenly the door to the lower deck opened and another man stepped out. He was pale and thin and had his blond hair tied in a ponytail. He had blown his pony back to a great one. He too was wearing a uniform that didn't seem to fit him properly.
"Ahoy captain. We have visitors.", Haggis turned to the man.
Joe's jaw dropped down. That was the captain of this ship ??? Judging by the first impression, the description "asparagus tarzan" would have come to mind.
"Who did you bring me back there, guys? Is there anything to get from them at all?" Replied the madwoman and looked at the three newcomers skeptically.
"Hello, I'm Captain Bunny D. Kate and that ...", Bunny started again with the introduction, but again that day she was not allowed to finish."A girl as a captain? That is supposed to be a joke!", The Dainty Lady's boss shouted disparagingly.
"Hey Threepwood, your old woman has you under her slipper, right?", A sneering voice penetrated her ear and then a skull actually rolled through the open door and came to stand upright in front of her feet. Joe let out a horrified scream and Bunny also took a step back. Had this thing just really spoken? Was this a ship of the living dead?
"Shut up, Murray! Damn it, why did I let myself get this annoyance on board with me?", The man sighed and rubbed his temples in exasperation.
"Because otherwise I would have cursed you terribly. After all, I am Murray, a powerful spirit of the underworld!", The skull shouted loudly and let his jaw rattle.
"Murray, the chattering hollow pear would probably fit better. And you're as scary as a broken sneaker.", the pale guy shouted back and gave Murray a kick that carried him in a high arc back through the door.
"I'm going to scream terribly ...", Murray's shouting of protest rose, but then cutthroat Bill slammed the door with his wooden leg and so the rest of the cursing was swallowed up by the wood.
"So where were we?" The captain asked exhausted and looked at his opponents again.
"Nice, since we've already chatted extensively about my private life, I can also introduce myself right away. My name is Guybrush Threepwood and I'm a mighty pirate! I don't know why my limited crew has collected you, because you’re sure to get no fabulous treasures, but at least I can practice a little fencing again. You there! Let's fight! ", he shouted to Joe and pulled out a saber that was hanging on his belt.
Poor Joe's heart almost stopped. How should he fight with this guy?He had never learned to fence, and most importantly, he didn't even have a sword.
"Sir, ... I ... I can't ... you ... you ... can have anything you want from me, but please ... spare me !!" he begged halted and began to rummage in his pockets in panic. All he found was the little green porcelain turtle his mother had given him for his birthday a few years ago. She was kind of a lucky charm for him and he always carried her with him. It certainly had no great material value, but it meant a lot to Joe and so it was incredibly difficult for him to leave this property to such a nasty guy. But he wanted to go on living and so he held out the turtle to his opponent with trembling hands.
Captain Threepwood stepped closer and eyed the potential prey suspiciously.
"It's not over ...?" He growled.
"Made of the finest china, sir!" Joe finished his sentence hopefully. Maybe the guy was a collector and would just let him run over such a beautiful piece out of sheer joy."Urgh, I hate china! Take that thing away! Hurry! I get goose bumps.", Threepwood choked and made a disgusted grimace.
Joe quickly put the turtle back in his pocket. Okay, joy looked a bit different ...
"Please leave my crew member alone! I'm the captain, so you'll have to take on me!" Bunny shouted bravely and stood protectively in front of Joe, who felt a bit humiliated by this action, because he had to himself Let a girl protect him, but he preferred that to being sliced ​​open now.
"In any case, the little girl has guts. Do you even have a sword, girl?" Threepwood asked with a grin.
"Uh, ... well, ... no, but ..." she replied, not very quick-witted. Now Bunny was stuttering too. She really should have thought about that beforehand. Her loose mouth always got her into trouble.
"Ha, big mouth and nothing behind it!I should have thought so. But I want to be gracious and lend you a saber. Then I'll teach you a lesson! "shouted the captain and instructed van Helgen to offer Bunny his sword.
Bunny immediately grabbed the gun and ran resolutely towards her opponent, ready to defend himself. But Threepwood dodged her skillfully and Bunny rammed the saber into the door with full force. Pulling it out of there was far more difficult and so she shook the thing in vain for a while without moving it even an inch.
"Hey, don't wave it around so uncontrollably, or you'll poke someone's eye out! You have no idea about insult fencing, do you?" Threepwood giggled in amusement.
"It's enough to overdo one thing for you and besides ... you just said defensive fencing ???", Bunny stopped short and let go of her saber problem for a moment.
"Exactly. I train the fine art of insult fencing, which is not just about muscle strength but above all about brains.You throw nasty insults at your opponent during the fight and the opponent has to try to give an answer that is as accurate as possible, but one that has to rhyme with what has been predicted. Quite unusual, huh? "Threepwood declared proudly.
"You could say that. But since I now know how it works, I would like to try again.", Bunny replied and tugged at her indisposed weapon again.
Haggis came to her aid and pulled the sword out of the wood with a loose wave of the hand.
"Here. Try your luck, little one.", He laughed and handed her the sword.
"All right, I'll give you one more chance. I'll start: Up until now every opponent has been eliminated by me!", Threepwood uttered his first insult and pulled out his saber again.
Bunny's mind raced. A suitable answer that should also rhyme? She hadn't fallen on her mouth, but she couldn't think of anything in a hurry. At a loss, she looked over at Joe, who had preferred to join Haggis and the others rather than stand in the middle of the action.He thought for a moment and then silently formed the word "fried".
"Mmh, um, ... I ... I like to eat my potatoes deep-fried!", Bunny replied hesitantly and tried to parry Threepwood's blow.
"Pff, miserable insult to beginners, and besides, that was announced!" The blonde smirked and Joe winced.
"Okay, next try, but if you cheat again, I'll cut your friend's tongue off! Insult number two: Have you always been so ugly or have you mutated?"
Damn it, Bunny's head felt like it was swept clean and she didn't dare to look over at Joe anymore. She trusted this madman to be capable of any torture. She stood there, frowning, thinking feverishly.
"Come on. I still have an appointment with the hairdresser!" Threepwood nagged impatiently.
That gave Bunny an idea.
"Can you repeat the insult again, please?" She asked hypocritically.
"As far as I'm concerned: have you always been so ugly or have you mutated?"Guybrush Threepwood repeated reluctantly.
"I've got it: Your reflection was probably reflected in my saber!" Bunny exclaimed proudly of her ingenious idea.
Your opponent was visibly surprised.
"Hey, not bad for a layman. I have to admit. Good, now it's your turn. Insult me, you brat!" He shouted defiantly.
To parry an insult was one thing, but to submit it yourself? Again she couldn't think of anything.
"Uh, ... mmh ... oh yes: your mother is so fat ...", she began.
"Hey, that really doesn't belong here!" Threepwood hissed angrily and Joe sighed and covered his forehead with his hand.
Okay, stupid idea, but Bunny wasn't about to give in anytime soon. You should get to know this guy! Again she spent quite a bit of time pondering about suitable swear words and the captain was already looking at his watch, shaking his head, but at last a flash of inspiration seemed to have come to her."Is your head sitting on your neck or is it just a hairy pimple?" She roared and looked at Threepwood determinedly.
Now it was up to him to think about it and he seemed to be having a hard time with it. He had never come across this insult in his long career and with the best will in the world, he couldn't think of anything witty. He felt the time running through his fingers and angrily he began to pull his hair. Surely it couldn't be that he, the mighty pirate captain Guybrush Threepwood, was defeated by a little girl in an insulting duel!
"How appropriate. You fight like a cow!" He managed defiantly, but he knew himself that he had lost.
"Hey, that doesn't make any sense and it doesn't even rhyme!" Complained Joe, dismayed.
"I know. I'm beaten. What a humiliation! Take my darling and get out of here! I have a headache!" Groaned Guybrush, his shoulders sagging in disappointment.Bunny felt sorry for him now.
"Sorry, but we don't need any treasure at the moment. Our ship is still too small for that, but with a bit of provisions and a nautical chart you would really help us, Captain Threepwood.", She addressed him conciliatory.
Guybrush looked at the girl in amazement. Didn't she really want his treasure? She seemed really serious. He wasn't sure whether he should put it under "goodness" or under "total stupidity", but in the end it was just right for him and therefore he gladly accepted her offer.
After Bunny and her gang had been provided with everything they needed and they had talked a little with Captain