Chapter: No title

Magic school
1st act
Note: This story was not written under the influence of drugs, it is solely due to our sick imagination.
We mean: Guilty, Nagi, Ken (or Chibi Teddy Chan)
Kurai, Tobias and of course me. Actually wanted to expand it and bring in more teachers, z. B our music teacher as a singing tree and our biology teacher as a helping elf, but unfortunately it didn't work anymore.

To teachers:

Reitertosch: I have to honestly say, I adored my art teachers, but I hated this person and still do.
I've never met anyone who had so little knowledge of art.
Just imagine Professor Trelawny from Harry Potter, just that she
insulted her students in the nastiest way and gave all pictures a bad mark that did not suit their taste.

Kuchheuser: Is a strange math teacher. He has high standards, demands a flawless notebook from all students and you don't understand a word when he's at the blackboard trying to explain something.He has a strange habit of smearing his face with chalk and always asks: Do you understand?

Riek: The sportiest and strictest math teacher I've ever seen.
Always with a smug smile, she probably thinks about how best to spoil her students for the day.
I hate to remember sports lessons, but hey ... the woman doesn't look like that, but she's better at handstands than all the others I know. Oh yes, she has a dog ... his name is Yoschi. Sweet no.
But all in all quite funny.

Strohlos: A totally crazy physics teacher who always has his cell phone with him and keeps talking about his mother and Star Wars.
He once jumped on the table in the middle of the hour and walked back and forth on it. Fortunately, I was just able to save my notebook. He always has very strange physical explanations ready. For reasons that are harmful to young people, I would rather not say more about it.

Hinz: Is a tensioner and first of all looks at each girl on a very specific spot.All girls who look pretty got a good grade. I never had him, that's why I can't say more about it, but he was a great handyman. ^^

Pick: The absolute evil in this story. If you had in class you didn't learn anything and he always leaves the bad jokes. He is unjust and harasses all students. Such an idiot!

Oh and one more thing: all students are fictitious. They also correspond to our sick imagination.
Guilty: I'm not sick.
Nagi: * guilty guck *
Crawford: Yes you are!
Guilty: * shake head * Ne ne. Only Fafi is sick.
Ken: Right, or Kurai.
Kurai: * grumble * I don't care. Can we finally get started?
Nagi: I don't want to write alone!
Crawford and Guilty: Oh man! Nagi!
Ken: Honk!
Kurai: * grumble *
Nagi: What?

(Reiter-Tosch comes to class, class is talking and painting, a Gothic magician is sitting in front.
Reiter-Tosch comes up to him and stands in front of him.)Reiter-Tosch: Well ... I think you worked with very sensitive colors on this picture ... (She pulls out a completely black picture.)
Reiter-Tosch: Well, let's get to the fine-tuning. So here (points to the upper corner) I would rework a bit, so put a little more feeling into the picture. And there (points to the other corner); I would put better shades
Gothic: shades ?!
Reiter-Tosch: (angry) Could you please not always interrupt me! So ... I find the whole thing a bit gloomy (makes quotes with your fingers).
Gothic: (looks confused) Really. (sighs)
Reiter-Tosch: (yells) Don't keep interrupting me! Well, actually I think the color matching is a bit unsuccessful and that's why I think you should still ... (points to the whole picture) ... let's say ... add pink dots!
<br>
<br> Gothic: Uh ... (lifts his finger)
<br>
<br> Reiter-Tosch: (angrily points to the door) OUT!
<br>
<br> (Students flinch and stop talking and quietly turn to their painting.Gothic shrugs his shoulders, takes the picture and leaves.)
<br>
<br> Reiter-Tosch: (looks angry and breathing heavily at the students) And you?! ...
<br>
<br> (Students swallow nervously.
<br> Reiter-Tosch goes to the desk and takes out a whip.)
<br>
<br> Reiter-Tosch: And line, line, line ... (with every crack with the whip, she calls out the line and the students follow their instructions like a robot.)
<br>
<br> ___
<br>
<br> (Kuchheuser enters the room; Ms. Reiter-Tosch hands him the whip; Kuchheuser looks at it confused and puts it away)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: Tomorrow children. So, what do we have today (picks up a stack of sheets, wants to see what he has today and drops it) Yikes, .... but it doesn't matter (laughs pissed off) ...
<br> So what did we have that on for today?
<br>
<br> (Nerd answers too clearly)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (sighs) Well ... yes?
<br>
<br> Nerd: Well, we had the 7 and 8 on, but I also did the 2 sides afterwards!(smiles nicely at Mr. Kuchheuser)
<br>
<br> (an annoyed murmur goes through the class)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: I praise that, you should all be like that.
<br>
<br> (renewed murmur)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: And who doesn't have the tasks for today ?! (looks angrily around)
<br>
<br> (nobody answers)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: Nice, and who has it incomplete ?! (looks around angrily again)
<br>
<br> (Cooler reports)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (roars) Yes, I am here in the madhouse! What are you thinking of behaving like that here!
<br>
<br> (All students flinch)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (exhales) Good ... then come up to the front and remember to write down (he exhales again; yells) that you are a total failure!
<br>
<br> (Everyone flinches again)
<br> (Cooler anxiously walks forward, throws his notebook on the desk)
<br> (Kuchheuser signs; gives him back the notebook)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: Let's save ourselves the comparison today, let's start with something new.<br>
<br> (moaning goes through the class)
<br> (Kuchheuser is already tinkering incomprehensible stuff on the board)
<br> (Meanwhile turns around again and again and asks &; Understand? but always turns around immediately)
<br> (After about 30 seconds he stops writing; turns to the students)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: Any questions?
<br>
<br> (All but the nerd point to)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: Well, none, then we can continue ...
<br>
<br> (turns back to the blackboard)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (turns around again) We could actually check our homework now.
<br>
<br> (Annoyed murmur)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: So who will read that out loud?
<br>
<br> Nerd: (answers again extremely) I, I, please take me!
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: Well, let's start.
<br>
<br> (Nerd reads out her results)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (when the nerd is finished) Nice, and who has it like that?
<br>
<br> (no one except the nerd get in touch)<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: Good, then that is probably correct. To ask?
<br>
<br> (All log in)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: None? Then we would have that too ... you guys work really well with today.
<br>
<br> (everyone sighs)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (looks at his watch) What, so late already? Boy, boy, we still have 10 new topics to tackle ...
<br>
<br> Freak: 10 pieces in ... (looks at the clock) 4 minutes ?!
<br>
<br> (everyone moans)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: You're right, that'll be close ... (grabs his chin and makes a small white spot on the spot) ... then we'll just go through 9. (smiles satisfied)
<br>
<br> Nerd: (points to)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: What please?
<br>
<br> Nerd: You have a stain there (pointing to the spot on your face) ...
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: Oh, where, here? (strokes his face and smears the chalk all over his face)
<br>
<br> (everyone laughs)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: What then, I want to laugh too ...<br>
<br> (Everyone keeps laughing)
<br> (bell sounds)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: What? Shit, I still have to give you homework. Then you have to work out the 9 topics yourself.
<br>
<br> (Students don't pay attention to him, they rush to the door; when the first one reaches the door :)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (roars angrily) STOP!
<br>
<br> (students echoed)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (picks up the whip) Have I already closed the lesson?
<br>
<br> (Students run back to their seats in panic)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (when everyone is sitting well) So, 'now' you can go.
<br>
<br> (students storm out of the room)
<br>
<br> Kuchheuser: (stays behind with the nerd) You tell the others about your homework, don't you?
<br>
<br> Nerd: Of course ...
<br>
<br> (Both leave the room)
<br>
<br> 1. Act end
<br> ___
<br>
<br> 2. act
<br>
<br> (Ms. Riek comes into the room, dressed in uniform and with a whip in her hand)
<br> (All students are dead silent and rigid)<br>
<br> Riek: So, gentlemen. Who is today without a ticket?
<br>
<br> (Some students report; Ms. Riek smiles and writes them down)
<br>
<br> Riek: Good .... or not. (She sees the cool chewing gum and stands in front of him) Pick up 10 chewing gum! And that I have red, green and yellow among them!
<br>
<br> (Cooler gets up, tears a sheet of paper out of the notebook, takes a dustpan and leaves the room)
<br> (Suddenly the kite alarm goes off; Ms. Rieck's eyes start to shine and she solemnly stands in front of the class)
<br>
<br> Riek: Today is the big day when we finally have the opportunity to sacrifice our lives senselessly in honor of the school. (Short pause) We'll fight to the last man. (Another pause) ... uh, student. We will face the monster fearlessly and prove our courage. We are grilled, crushed and torn to pieces until we are no longer recognized ..... but of course we can also go home.<br>
<br> (Schoolchildren look at Ms. Riek, frightened and desperate)
<br>
<br> Riek: I think we should rather take the latter.
<br>
<br> (students nod in relief)
<br>
<br> Riek: You now jump out of the window with a roll and come up again with your feet.
<br>
<br> (Students look