Chapter: The date

I think I'll finally upload the last chapter of this one ^^ Took a long time, although I've finished it for ages * drop *
Whatever. Here comes the end and the strange date with Nouelle. There are a few allusions, such as the mention of the gruesome nickname Schniefelus, where I am utterly ashamed of having used it ...
Whatever.
Have fun XD

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Severus floated happily through his house. Another half an hour before he had to show up at Captain Bluebear's fish restaurant on his date.
Carefully he took a black tailcoat out of his closet. It was still wrapped in transparent foil and had no wrinkles at all. He put it on slowly and looked at himself in the mirror. The tailcoat fit him like a glove and made him look really elegant. It was black all over, except for the white shirt and deep dark green collar. Severus put his wand in the side pocket.
He ran his shiny black hair one last time and Disapparated into the restaurant and to Nouelle.When Severus sat down again, he was horrified to see that he had just appeared in the toilet. And it gave with a crack under his weight. With his elbow he fell against the irrigation, which tried to wash him away with enormous suction.
There was a scream from next door that shocked him even more. It wasn't a man's scream. Should that mean that he is on the…. He closed his eyes and covered his eyes with his hands. He should have known. His first date in many years and it couldn't have gone worse. And you could literally see that.
He had messed up his best suit with toilet water, stank of toilet cleaner and urine stone and was actually stuck in a ladies' room!
There was a knock at the door.
"Excuse me, are you all right? Do you need help?"
Severus froze in his awkward position.
Was Maura chasing him or was he just imagining it?Surely this woman didn't want to screw up his date with Nouelle? Although, he thought bitterly, I've already done it myself.
"No, everything is fine here!", He beeped in a disguised voice.
"Are you sure?" Asked Maura.
"YES!" He growled. This woman drove him crazy. He was holding onto a container for toilet paper and wanted to pull himself up, but ... CRACK! he broke off and scattered its contents on the floor. EXCELLENT! Severus thought. It couldn't get any better.

But he was wrong, because Maura pushed open the door, gripped by the helper syndrome, and pushed the hard wood of the door against his head. Screaming in pain, he jumped up, freed himself from his damp prison, ran out of the toilet and hid behind the next plant.

What am I doing here? And what did I do in the ladies room? And why, WHY am I so wet? Severus had lost his memory when Maura slammed the ladies' room door.He didn't know anything anymore, but decided to make the best of this situation and waddled with his legs apart (his pants were still wet) in the direction of the men's toilet. Once there, he stood under the automatic hand dryer and let the warm air blow on his pants. That looked extremely strange, which the other men who stood at the standing basin or at the sink also found.

After his pants were dry, he ran back into the restaurant and sat down on a chair. A tall, gray-haired woman promptly drove up to him and sat down on the chair across from him. "Severus! What a surprise to see you here! What are you doing here?" Severus looked up.
“Excuse me, do we know each other?” The woman laughed.
"Severus, you and your humor! Don't pretend. Be honest. What are you doing here? I have a date here with someone, but he can't be seen ..."
Severus stared at her. "What did you just call me?Severus? Is that my name? "
The woman returned his gaze puzzled. "Tell me, have you had a drink? It's me. Your colleague. Minerva McGonagall. Don't you remember?"
Severus thought hard and shook his head.

Minerva looked at Severus in disbelief and concern. Obviously she thought that her beloved colleague was completely gone. Severus noticed this look and stood up uncertainly.
"I think I'd better go then. Good afternoon, Mrs. McGonagall." He turned around and pushed his foot out a little too far.

A waiter, armed with a silver tray, tripped over this foot, struck him lengthways and tossed the tray, which was loaded with lobster, high into the air. As luck would have it, this tray hit Severus' head directly. It collapsed briefly, but quickly got up again. Disgusted, he pulled the lobster off his head. Then he looked around and saw Minerva."What are you doing here?" He snapped at her. Minerva blinked in confusion, then composed herself again.
In a no less unfriendly tone, she snapped back, "I've got a date with a man, if you don't mind. And anyway, what are you playing here ???"

Severus didn't know what to answer to that. Sighing, he sat down on the chair. “I also have a date, but she's not showing up.” Why was he telling her this? She looked at him sympathetically and understandingly.

"My date didn't show up either. I don't even know what he looks like. I got a totally ridiculous name for him. I called myself Nouelle at the dating agency."

Severus froze. Minerva? Nouelle? Both? Equal? The same person? Fate really was not kind to him. Fate? No, all of life.

Minerva had noticed his petrified expression and asked "Severus, is something?"
He stuttered, "You are Nouelle?Oh my godness!"
Minerva looked at him questioningly for a while and then her eyes widened too.
“You are my… date?” Severus nodded stiffly.
"Wonderful!", Minerva mumbled and she seemed to be thinking the same as him: Why only me? What have I done?
Minerva was the first to open her mouth again. "Well, well, maybe we should make the best of it," she suggested and Severus added in his thoughts: Or just let it be and flee the room before someone seriously closes Damage is coming.

Before he could explain his plan to Minerva, Maura came over to her table. With a confident expression on her face, she stood up in front of the two of them. "There you are at last, mousebear!"
Severus' blood froze. MOUSE BEARS ???
Minerva looked at him and Maura, startled. "Who is that?" She asked.

Now it was indeed a terrible situation. Although Minerva wasn't excited about spending the evening with him, she seemed even less excited about what her mind was brewing at the sight of Maura."Who am I?" Asked Maura pointedly. "I'm his date."
Finished with nerves and the world, Severus let his head fall into his hands. Even now he noticed Minerva's icy gaze. Timidly he looked up and into her face. If looks could kill…
The woman is really good. It rivals me, he thought as he looked at it. It's a shame that he couldn't be happy about it.

"You have two dates at the same time? You bastard!" Hissed Minerva and got up. Severus started to calm her down and wanted to explain that this was all a misunderstanding and that Maura was a crazy stalker, but then he changed his mind. What should he bother?

Minerva had meanwhile drawn the attention of the whole restaurant and sobbed in an exaggeratedly loud voice "You are the meanest guy I have ever met. I'll break up, Severus!" Restaurant.Was she even aware that we weren't even together yet? Severus wondered, turning around. In front of him stood Maura with a triumphant expression and icy looks came from all other sides. Apparently, he was the bad guy here.

"Nasty!" Came from somewhere from the right.
"Cheat!" Came from behind.
"Cheater!"
There were a few more nasty insults, but the last thing was what was the meanest thing you could slap Severus on the head.

Someone shouted: "Schniefelus!" (Sorry, had to be, please don't hit)

Shaking with anger, Severus whirled around. He was looking for someone in the crowd to punish for what he had just heard. He regretted that Harry wasn't in the crowd. He tried to control himself, but unfortunately it didn't quite work out. Before anything bad could happen, he decided to leave this restaurant.

On the way out the door, he had a brilliant idea. He would go to his loyal fan club (it wasn't too late that Friday) and give detention to everyone who had gathered there.He grinned to himself quietly. Yes, now it was clear to him what he had known all along. He didn't need a dating agency. The dungeon sisters loved him, and he loved them, every one of them. He went lively into the sunset. Before Apparating to the dungeon, he thought back over the past two weeks and realized it

NEVER AGAIN!

And he disappeared.

the end