Chapter: Stand in the rain

I stood there. Alone. As always, since that day. The rain pelted my umbrella and the sky seemed to be crying. Just like me, only you couldn't see my tears. I couldn't show any weakness, I had to be strong. At least for him. I didn't want to be sorry, what was the point of showing weakness? It wouldn't change anything, the past couldn't be changed. But still I stood here, at least once a week. In the place where he saved me.
It was an intersection, but only thirty were allowed. I had crossed the street, no car far and wide, at least that's what I thought. I wasn't really careful either. I was fooling around on the street, something I never did and never would again afterwards. A Porsche was approaching, it could do a good 90 things, it was a rich youngster, a spoiled, superficial kid who only cared about being cool. I saw him afterwards completely distraught and desperate in the courtroom. There it was with his mask.
I didn't notice the Porsche, he did. "Watch out!" he still shouted, but by then it was already too late. Now I noticed the Porsche too and I couldn't move anymore. I was frozen. I'm still mad today, why? Why was my body failing when I needed most of it? It wouldn't happen to me today, I was sure of that. I had trained so that this would not happen to me again.
I was completely focused on the car at the time, so I didn't notice him walking towards me. I only noticed how he pushed me away and watched with wide eyes as he was hit by the car.
The worst moment in my life, even today I see everything as if it happened in slow motion. I see how it is captured, how it hits the windshield and how it then continues to spin and thunder onto the asphalt. I also see the frightened face of the driver and his fellow passenger, with whom he had talked seconds ago.
But what I remember most is the face of him as he lays on the floor. Although his eyes were only a crack open, I still saw no fear or even regret, his eyes radiated determination, strength and no fear. And I saw that he knew he was going to die. A small smile graced his lips and this did not go out, even when the ambulance tried to revive him.
Exactly, we immediately called the emergency doctor, I was sitting with him, unfortunately he had his eyes closed shortly after the accident and so they stayed, no matter what the doctors tried. That day I lost him, on October 21st. 09, he was only 15, just like me. That was exactly a year ago and at the beginning it was very difficult for me. It just hurt, I wanted to kill myself.
I don't believe in the afterlife. I believe that death is infinite freedom and that there is no pain, no sorrow, no more anything and that is exactly what I wanted.But I didn't, why? He told me suicide is only for cowards. The really brave, endure the pain and try not to cause more pain.
And that's exactly what I'm doing, and who says I can't be happy again. I'm sure he would have wanted it that way. Of course I will never forget him and not what he did for me.
Suddenly I saw it and my heart almost stopped. A ball rolled onto the street and a boy ran after it. A car was approaching, but luckily my reflexes had improved, so I grabbed the child by the collar and quickly pulled him back. Fortunately, the car was also sticking to the limit, so there certainly wouldn't have been any problems. But as the saying goes: Better safe than sorry, at least in such matters.
"Lars, I always told you, never run out into the street. Why do you even play ball in such bad weather?" "He's right. You could have done something else." Anyway. Uh. "I grabbed the little boy's shoulder and forced him to look into my eyes. He was frightened, I also looked at him seriously. I hate it when people played with their lives like that. Looking left and right was not that difficult. “Listen, little one! Do you see the cross.” Not me to his white cross. "Somebody died here because he rescued someone who just acted stupid and thought you didn't have to take care of yourself, nothing would happen anyway. You know, the people who put their lives on the line should rather die instead of the people they save. "I spoke rather coolly. The boy must have got a little scared and disappeared.
"That was tough but true. And thank you for" saving "my little brother. I'm Olivier, by the way." He stood by me under my umbrella, the rain was still pattering on in and accompanied the conversation with muffled drumming noises.
Oliver held out his hand to me. I didn't take it. "Tomari." "What kind of name is that?" "It is Japanese and means night." "Aren't you cold, I only mean in the top." "No." He scratched the back of his head. "Brothers are really annoying."
"Water is thicker than blood!"
"What?"
"Water is thicker than blood!"
Yes, it really was. He had proven it to me often enough. At first I was really upset when my parents fought for his adoption, it was a really difficult life. But he soon became my big brother, even though he was only 4 months older than me. He always stood by me, we always helped each other, no matter what, we could always rely on the other, even though he did not come into my life until I was 9 years old.
Water is thicker than blood!
I turned to go. "Hey, where are you going, shall we meet again?"
I just walked through the rain. The sun slowly appeared behind the clouds, there would be a rainbow.It was still raining, but the sun slowly came out of its hiding place.
"I love you, big brother!"